I Can't Hide My Heart
by Piper Elizabeth
Summary: After a traumatizing experience, Ray and Neela must come to terms with their feelings for one another.
1. Chapter 1

Okay, this is my first ER fic so please be kind. I never thought I'd write an ER fic but, this story came to me one night while I was in the shower and I figured I should just go with it. I haven't exactly figured out where I'm going with it but I guess I'll just let it flow. I hope you like it and please send me your comments/suggestions!

**Chapter 1**

"We're going to be late!" Neela shouted, pounding on the closed door. She folded her arms across her chest, angrily. She had been standing outside for the last twenty minutes, trying her best to stay calm while her bladder screamed that it needed to be emptied. As Neela raised her hand to the door once more, she heard the shower being turned off and the door swung open.

"It's all yours," Ray smirked, holding the towel at his waist. Water dripped down his body and began forming a small puddle on the floor.

"You're dripping," Neela informed him as she brushed past him, trying her best not to stare at his chest. Their skin made contact quickly, his arm rubbing against her shoulder. She tried to ignore the shiver of excitement that ran down her spine.

"You're welcome," Ray said as Neela slammed the door behind her.

It was a usual morning for them, fighting over the bathroom. Neela was usually able to sneak in the shower before he even woke up in the morning but she had spent all night working and, after only four hours of sleep, her body just wouldn't let her get up any earlier and she indulged herself in oversleeping. While she was waiting outside of the bathroom, she reminded herself never to oversleep again.

Ray stood in the hallway for a moment, staring at the closed door. It amazed him that just seeing her could elicit such feelings from him. Even with her hair matted from her pillow and her clothes wrinkled from sleeping, seeing her for just a few, short seconds, made him feel more alive than he had ever felt before.

Shaking his head, Ray sauntered back to his bedroom.

A half hour later, they had both successfully made it into work on time. Before they even had time to drop off their things in the lounge, Pratt was yelling Neela's name and Ray was summoned to triage. It was going to be yet another long shift.

"There was a man hit by a car," Jerry announced to anyone who was listening, the phone still attached to his hear.

"How bad?" Neela asked.

Jerry hung up the phone. "Didn't say."

"How far out?"

"Four minutes."

"Alright, I've got it," Neela announced. "Chuny, you're with me."

Neela quickly grabbed a pair of gloves from a box hanging on the wall and she and Chuny headed outside. The ambulance pulled in minutes later, followed by two police cars.

"What's going on?" Neela asked as the two police officers got out of their cars and went to the back of the ambulance.

"This man's a prisoner," one of the officers answered.

"What's he in prison for?" Chuny asked.

"Rape and murder," the other officer answered.

Neela reached for the door handle of the ambulance without skipping a beat.

"This guy's a real asshole," the officer stated, blocking Neela from being able to open the door.

"He may be an asshole but he's an asshole who needs medical attention." She maneuvered past him and opened up the door. Two more police officers were sitting inside with the paramedics.

"What have we got?" Neela asked as the paramedics lowered the gurney from the ambulance and rolled it towards the hospital doors.

The paramedics caught Neela up to speed, spouting off his vitals. He had been knocked unconscious but the severity of the damage was unknown. The officers, who were walking with them explained that he had been hit by one of the transport vans just as he was about to be transferred to a different prison.

"We think he jumped," one of the officers remarked.

"What's his name?" Chuny asked.

"Harry Marx," one of the officers answered.

"We should have let the bastard die on the street," another commented.

"Officers, if you will be please wait outside, Neela ordered as they wheeled him into the trauma room.

"We're not leaving his side."  
"This man's barely breathing. I don't think he's going anywhere considering his state," Neela snapped back impatiently. "Besides, it looks like you've got him pretty well secured." She pointed to the pair of metal handcuffs that chained him to the bed.

"We'll be right outside," one of the officers stated.

The officers hesitantly stepped out of the room but did not go far from the doors. Neela worked quickly, rechecking his vitals and ordering the necessary tests.

"What's going on?" Pratt asked as he swept in through the swinging doors. "What's up with Miami vice out there?"

"Convict," Neela reported. "Looks like he's got blood in his belly and maybe a broken pelvis. He's got to go up to surgery."

"I'll call them," Chuny said as she reached for the phone.

"You got this Neela?" Pratt questioned, not doubting Neela's abilities for a moment. If anyone, she was the person who could handle a trauma alone and, with the rate that people were pouring into the ER, this man wouldn't be the only patient she'd have to handle by herself.

"All set," Neela replied.

"Surgery's ready for him," Chuny announced, hanging up the phone.

"He's stable. Let's bring him up," Neela decided.

Neela quickly raised the side bars of the gurney and, with Chuny's help, pushed the gurney through the swinging doors and into the elevators.

Just minutes later, she was back in the ER, her patient upstairs being prepped for surgery. Neela walked towards the reception desk and grabbed the man's chart.

"He gonna make it?" One of the officers asked her as he walked up to the desk.

"I thought you had both gone upstairs," Neela answered as she began filling out the necessary information.

"Jack and Luke did. I've got to get back to the prison but I gotta know. He gonna make it?"

"Looks like it."

"How long is he going to be here?"

"It's difficult to say. The surgeon would be able to tell you more." Neela answered as she began filling out the chart.

"You should have let him die," he stated.

Impatiently, Neela set the chart down on the counter.

"If you and your buddies wanted him to die so much why'd you call an ambulance and bring him to the ER?" Neela quipped. She wasn't usually so hostile with the people she spoke to but the lack of sleep and the five minute, cold shower she had that morning did not leave her in the mood for conversation.

The man didn't respond. Neela rolled her eyes and began to walk away but the officer grabbed her tightly by the arm.

"Let go of me!" She commanded.

"He's a smart man," the officer explained. "That man could talk his way out of anything. He was sentenced to life after raping and murdering the two women who lived next door to him. He was released on parole and somehow sweet talked his way to get the judge's address who sentenced him in the first place." The officer's grip grew tighter. "He found her at home and murdered her and her family that same night. Two little boys, five and eight. Took us three years to catch him again and, when we finally did, he talked his way into a mental institution instead of prison."

"My job is to be a doctor, not a judge," Neela explained. "Now let go of me!"

"I just thought you should know who you're dealing with. Don't underestimate him."

"Is there a problem?" Ray asked as he walked up behind Neela.

The officer immediately let go of Neela's arm and briskly walked away. Neela rubbed her sore arm.

"Did he hurt you?"

"It's nothing."

"What was that all about?"

"Just some guy I treated."

"You sure you're okay?"  
"I'm fine, Ray."

"GSW to the chest. Ten minutes out!" Jerry shouted, the phone again clutched in his hand.

"Got it," Ray and Neela said at the same time.


	2. Chapter 2

All I have to say before you read this chapter is I do apologize for my lack of knowledge about medicine and that goes for the whole story. This chapter's a little more action packed so I hope you like it!

**Chapter 2**

"You wanna grab a bite to eat before we head home?"

Ray stood at his locker, and hung up his white, lab jacket. Neela stood a few lockers over, throwing a sweatshirt over her head.

"Chinese?" Ray asked.

"Sounds good to me." Neela pulled the sweatshirt down her torso. "I just want to check on a patient before we leave." She grabbed her bag from inside her locker and shut it. "I'll meet you outside."

She walked out of the lounge and made her way to the fourth floor.

"Dr. Rasgotra," a nurse said as Neela walked by.

"Do you have the chart for Harry Marx?"

"The prisoner?" The nurse walked over to the desk in the middle of the hall, shuffled through a number of charts, and then handed one of them over to Neela. "Careful, I think the police officer in his room is trigger happy."

"Yeah, this Marx guy seemed to have a knack for ticking them off. I'll return the chart when I'm through."

The nurse nodded and continued on her way. Neela located his room number and walked to the end of the hall. She began to look at his chart as she opened the door and stepped into the room.

"Close the door or I'll shoot," a raspy voice commanded.

Neela looked up from the chart. Marx was sitting up in his bed, his arm outstretched with a gun in his hand.

"What are…"

"Don't talk!" He yelled. Neela jumped slightly. "Put your hands up, slowly close the curtains, and get away from the door."

Neela immediately raised her two hands in the air. As she made her way slowly across the room, she noticed the police officer lying in a pool of his own blood on the floor. Her first instinct was to kneel beside him to check if he was still alive but she knew that there was nothing she or anyone could do for him now. He had lost too much blood.

As Neela walked closer to the bed, the man kept his gun aimed at her the entire time.

"Sit," he bellowed, motioning to a plastic chair that was beside his bed. She did as told.

"The nurse will be doing her rounds soon. Someone will find us and…"

"The nurse does her rounds every twenty-seven minutes. And, since you just came in to check on me, I don't think we have to worry about that."

"Why are you doing this?"

"I'm gonna get out of here. Get out of prison."

"Killing a man is not the way to get out of prison."

"When I want your opinion, I'll ask for it," Marx said, holding the gun to her temple. Neela flinched as the cold metal made contact with her skin. She heard the clinking of his handcuffs against the metal bars on his gurney.

"So what's your plan? How do you plan on getting out of here?"

"Taking you hostage and just walking out of here."

"You can't even walk," Neela pointed out. "You just had surgery."

"Exploratory surgery," he said. "The bleeding wasn't as bad as they thought. I'm going to be fine."

"But you're still coming off the anesthesia and your wound is still fresh…"

"Then you'll wheel me out of here," he insisted.

"I just don't…"

"Stop talking!" He yelled.

A hundred thoughts flooded Neela's mind. She thought of ways she might be able to escape and she thought of ways that she would be able to knock the gun out of his hands. He was obviously weak but yet stronger than she realized as told by the dead police officer on the ground who had been killed by his own gun. She thought about what would happen if the nurse did come in to check on them. Would he shoot her like he had shot the police officer? Neela tried not to think about it.

Downstairs, Ray paced in front of the front doors. Neela had been gone for nearly a half an hour. Ray's stomach grumbled angrily. Annoyed, Ray stormed back into the ER.

"Has anyone seen Neela?" He grumbled, standing at the front desk.

"Last I saw she was heading upstairs," Chuny answered as she typed away on one of the computers.

"Was she checking on a patient?"

Chuny shrugged. "That convict was in recovery after surgery on the fourth floor," she stated.

"Thanks Chuny."

Ray briskly walked over to the elevators.

"I thought you left," Morris said as Ray passed him.

"I thought so, too," Ray agreed.

The elevator doors opened and Ray stepped inside. He punched the button for the fourth floor and waited while the elevator rose. Once the elevator doors opened, Ray immediately began walking down the hallway, quickly glancing in the rooms as he went by, trying to spot Neela.

"Looking for something?" A nurse asked.

"Yes, actually, Dr. Rasgotra," Ray answered.

"Last room on the left," the nurse stated.

Ray thanked her and went to the last room. He reached for the door handle.

Inside the room, Neela heard the door handle being turned. She closed her eyes, silently praying that the door opening wouldn't be followed by a gun shot.

"Neela, I…" Ray began as he slowly stepped into the room.

"Shut the door or I'll shoot her."

Ray looked over at the bed but only saw Neela standing there with Marx's hand gripping her upper arm. He couldn't see the gun but, considering the officer on the floor, he believed it.

"Just put the gun down," Ray said.

"Shut and lock the door or I'll shoot her."

Ray did as he was told.

"I don't know what you're…" Ray started to say.

"What's your name?" Marx cut him off.

"Ray," Ray answered.

"And her?"

"Neela," Ray replied.

"Neela, if you wouldn't mind taking that chair right there and putting it against the wall next to the door and tying your little friend Ray up, I would greatly appreciate it," Marx stated. Neela slowly picked up the chair and moved it against the wall. For the first time, Ray saw the gun. As Ray sat on the chair, he placed his arm on Neela's shoulder.

"You okay?" He whispered.

"No talking!" Marx shouted.

Neela nodded slightly and walked over to one of the drawers. She rummaged through it.

"What are you looking for?" Marx demanded to know.

"I can't tie him up if I don't have anything to use," she responded. She continued to look through the drawer.

"Just find something and get to it!" Marx bellowed, impatiently.

Neela opened the drawer below the one she had been rummaging through and began looking through it even though she already had the medical tape she would use to tie Ray up. She was looking for something else that she could use as a weapon but there was nothing. She closed the drawer and turned to face Ray.

"Get on with it," Marx snarled. Neela approached Ray with the medical tape in hand. "Tie his arms to the chair's arms and his legs to the chair's legs."

Ray rested his arms on the armrests. Neela kneeled in front of him and pulled out a long strip of tape. She began to slowly wrap it around his arm and the arm of the chair. She couldn't take his eyes off of his as she worked.

"I'm sorry," she mouthed even though no words came out. A tear rolled down her cheek.

Ray nodded and desperately wanted to wipe the tear from her cheek. He wanted to tell her that it was all going to be okay but he kept his mouth closed, knowing that Marx would threaten one of them again, or start making good on his threats, if he did.

Neela finished wrapping the tape around his left arm and then moved to his right.

"Nice and tight now," Marx commanded.

Neela finished his arms and went on to his legs. When she was done, she turned back towards Marx, unsure of what to do. She noticed that his gun was no longer pointed at her and was instead by his side. A circle of blood had formed on his blanket.

"I can still shoot him," Marx assured her with a shaky voice. Neela looked at where the gun was pointed. It was directly aimed at Ray.

"You must have ripped open your wound," Neela explained.

"Then sew it back up again."

"I'd need the right tools and I'll have to numb the area and…"

"No shots. You give me anything and I'll shoot him. Find a needle and some thread and sew me up." Neela went to a cabinet and began taking out the necessary equipment. "I've got a plan, you know. A plan to get us all out of here. She stitches me up, makes me good as new, you find the handcuff keys on our friend over there and uncuff me, and then I trade in this robe for that police uniform that just so happens to be lying there on the floor. The three of us walk out of here and get to the airport. Then, I board a plane and go somewhere warm…with her."

"No," Ray barked.

"I don't think you have a say in the matter," Marx replied.

"What do you need her for? Once you're at the airport, you're free to go."

"Taking her with me ensures that no one will be following me. I see one officer and I'll kill her." Marx smiled. Neela dragged a cart over to Marx's bedside. "Don't worry, we can take a little vacation together. Maybe we can even go to some remote island and ask for the honeymoon sweet. Jail's a lonely place, you know." He reached his hand up and stroked Neela's hair.

"She's not going anywhere with you," Ray proclaimed, struggling against the tape that held him to the chair.

Marx smiled, dropping his hand back to his side. "You two lovers or something?" Ray didn't respond. "Oh come on, you can tell me," he coaxed.

"We're roommates," Ray responded.

"Is that what they're calling it these days?" Marx joked. Marx looked from Ray to Neela and then back again.

"You love her?" Startled, Neela dropped the latex glove that she was putting one her hand. She left the glove on the floor and reached for another glove from a nearby box. "I've never seen any man look at a woman the way you look at her. And, for what it's worth, she looks at you the same way, too."

"I need you to be still," Neela said, changing the subject. She threaded the needle and poked it through Marx's chest. He clenched his teeth but didn't make a sound. Neela began sewing him up slowly. As she reached the end of his wound and began to tie off the end of her stitch, she heard the door handle shake and the sound of someone shouting. Neela grabbed the needle that she had hid in her pocket and plunged it into Marx's chest as the gun went off.


	3. Chapter 3

This was an interesting, yet logistically difficult chapter to write. I hope everything makes sense and again, I apologize for knowing nothing about medicine. As always, I hope everyone enjoys it and let me know what you think!

**Chapter 3**

"Neela!" Ray shouted, though his voice was drowned out by the kicking at the door. Ray tried to wriggle free from the tape that bound him to the chair but the tape stuck fast. He felt helpless. Neela's lifeless body was lying at his feet, only inches from him and the dead police officer. Marx was slumped over in bed, unconscious, the gun by his hand.

Finally, the door flew open and two officers raced in with guns in their hands.

"Get a doctor!" Ray yelled. One of the officers shouted down the hallway for a doctor while the other officer made his way over to Marx's bed. Two nurses and a doctor, neither of whom Ray recognized, flew into the room and knelt beside Neela. The second officer grabbed a scalpel and began cutting through the tape that held Ray to the chair.

"What happened?" The first officer asked, leaving Marx's side and squatting by the dead police officer.

"Get Dr. Kovac in the ER," Ray demanded, ignoring the officer's questions. There would be time for questions later. For now, he had to save Neela. One of the nurses picked up the phone on the wall and called down to the ER.

"There's no pulse," the second nurse stated as she began CPR.

As soon as he was free, Ray threw himself onto the ground and practically pushed the second nurse out of his way. He took over pumping his fists against Neela's chest and he began to assess Neela's bullet wound.

"Get a gurney!" Ray barked at the nurse. She left the room. "Keep pressure on the wound," Ray commanded the doctor, noticing that the young man was beside himself. He was obviously just an intern who had been stuck with monitoring the patients during the night shift.

Kovach appeared in the doorway and immediately raced to Neela's side. The nurse arrived with the gurney and together, they carefully picked Neela up and placed her on the bed. Ray continued to do CPR as Kovac spouted off orders.

"The bullet nicked her lung," Kovac declared.

"She's not going to die," Ray stated, continuously pumping her chest. As long as he could get a pulse, he knew there was hope.

"We've got to get her stable and into surgery," Kovac said.

"Get me a chest tube!" Ray shouted.

One of the nurses handed him one and he skillfully inserted it into Neela's mouth. The other nurse worked on hooking Neela up to the necessary monitors, which then filled the room with beeping.

"Suction," Kovac yelled.

"I got a pulse," Ray exclaimed.

After a few more minutes, her pulse was steady and Kovac finished his assessment.

"Let's wheel her down to surgery," Kovac decided. They hurriedly wheeled Neela out of the room and down the hall to the OR. One of the surgeons was already there to meet them. They pushed her into the sterile room. Ray tried to follow her but Kovac put his hand on Ray's shoulder and held him back.

"Let the surgeons do their job," he said.

"She can't die," Ray whispered, tears welling in his eyes. He blinked them away, not wanting to yet feel the emotions that he knew were coming.

"They're going to do all they can do for her," Kovac assured him, knowing that Ray had given the same speech to so many family member's before. There was nothing more difficult than being the person on the other side of the conversation.

"Dr. Kovac, is it?" one of the officers said as he walked up to Kovac and Ray.

"Yeah," Kovac replied, shaking the man's hand. "This is Dr. Ray Barnett."

Ray also shook his hand.

"I'm Officer Rodriguez. We're going to need to ask you a few questions."

"Can't this wait?" Kovac asked. He noticed that Ray hadn't taken his eyes from the door that led to the OR.

Ray sighed. "It's okay. I'm gonna have to tell them sooner or later and I'd rather be there in the recovery room when Neela wakes up instead of sitting here being asked questions."

Kovac nodded and both he and Ray followed Rodriguez back to the recovery room. Kovac walked inside while Ray stood by the door. Ray noticed that someone had covered the dead police officer with a sheet. The second police officer was standing by Marx. He had put another pair of handcuffs around his wrist. Kovac squatted beside the dead body on the floor and picked up the corner of the sheet.

"His name was Mark Rowland," the other officer said to Kovac, pointing to the officer on the ground. "He was supposed to get married next month,"

"He probably died instantly," Kovac explained. "The bullet looks like it punctured the heart." He dropped the sheet and stood.

"Rick Harmon," the officer said, shaking Kovac's hand. "What's going on with Marx?"

Kovac began to examine him.

"He was just given a sedative," Kovac replied, "probably Haldol." Kovac bent down and looked under the bed. He pulled out an empty needle and showed it to the officer's.

"How long will the sedative last?" Harmon wondered.

"It depends on how much he was given. If this needle was full, he could be out for a good six hours."

"Neela must have stabbed him with the needle before he shot her," Ray realized.

Kovac picked up a pillow from the end of the bed. There was a bullet hole right through the middle. Kovac showed it to the officers.

"He must have shot Mark through the pillow," Rodriguez surmised. "It would have quieted the gun shot."

"If there was a trauma coming through, no one would have heard it," Kovac stated.

Rodriguez turned to Ray. "What exactly happened in here, Dr. Barnett?"

Ray leaned against the wall and ran his hand through his hair. He thought of Neela in surgery. Not knowing if she would survive or not was tearing him up inside.

"We were both leaving…our shifts were over," Ray finally began. He tried to temporarily stop thinking about Neela and concentrate on everything that had happened but he couldn't. The image of her body on the ground stayed in his mind. He paused, trying to gather his thoughts. "She said she wanted to do something before she left so I told her I'd meet her outside. When she didn't come out, I went looking for her and found out that she was up here checking on Marx. I opened the door and saw the officer dead on the ground and Neela was standing in front of Marx's bed. He said he had a gun and that he would shoot her if I did anything."

"Did you see the gun?"

Ray shook his head. "He had it on Neela's back. She was standing in front of him so I couldn't see it."

"So what did you do?"

"We did whatever he told us to do. Neela tied me up and then we noticed that he was bleeding out. He had ripped his stitches so he told Neela to sew him back up. She must have grabbed the needle while she was getting her supplies and hid it somewhere…in her pocket maybe. She sewed him up and then the door handle jiggled and Marx flipped out. I couldn't really see because Neela's back was to me but the gun went off and she fell to the floor. And then there was the pounding at the door and you guys busted in."

"We were changing shifts," Rodriguez explained. "When we saw that the door was locked, we knew something was wrong so we tried to knock it down. Then we heard the gunshot."

"What's your relationship to her?" Harmon asked.

Ray looked up at him blankly. How could he explain their relationship especially when he couldn't even explain it to himself?

"We work together and we're roommates," Ray mumbled.

"Are you romantically involved?" Harmon questioned.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Kovac responded, noticing Ray's shocked reaction to the question.

"We're just trying to get an accurate picture of what went on here," Harmon remarked.

"We're friends," Ray snapped. The word felt sour on his tongue. Somehow just calling them friends didn't do justice to their real relationship.

"What's going to happen to Marx now?" Kovac questioned, changing the subject. He could sense that talking about their relationship was painful for Ray.

"We'll double the security on his room," Rodriguez answered. "When he's well enough, we'll take him back to jail and he'll be charged with murder, kidnapping, and attempted murder. Or, if she doesn't make it, he'll…"

"She'll make it," Ray interrupted.

"We're very sorry," Rodriguez apologized.

"Tell that to Neela," Ray retorted.

Ray stormed out of the room and back towards the OR. He stood outside, just staring at the closed door.

"You should go home," Kovac said as he walked up behind Ray.

"I'm not leaving her," he replied.

Kovac nodded, knowing that he would get that response. "Let us know when she gets out of surgery," he instructed, patting Ray on the back. "And let us know if you need anything."

Ray nodded but didn't take his eyes off the door. Kovac headed back towards the elevator. As soon as Ray was sure he was gone, a tear slipped down his cheek.


	4. Chapter 4

I have to admit that this was one of the more difficult chapters to write because I didn't exactly know where I wanted to go with it. It is also the shortest chapter so far and I wanted to make it longer but I'm finally happy with the way it came out and I hope you like it, too. Comments please!

**Chapter 4**

"I don't know if you can hear me but…I want you to know that I'm here and that I'm not going anywhere."

Rat sat beside Neela's bed, holding her hand. He softly stroked his thumb back and forth over her palm. With his other hand, he pushed a piece of her raven black hair behind her ear. His knuckles grazed her forehead. The feeling of her skin pressed against his own electrified him. The thought, though, that she might fade away and he would never be able to touch her skin again horrified him.

She had been wheeled out of surgery almost three hours before. The surgeon had successfully repaired her lung but there was still no telling whether or not she'd fully recover. She had lost so much blood and there was always the chance of infection. Amazingly, though, she was breathing on her own.

Ray's stomach grumbled loudly. He still hadn't eaten but he couldn't bring himself to leave her side. He thought about the Chinese food that they had planned on. He knew exactly which restaurant they would have gone to and exactly what Neela would have ordered. He would have given anything to be sitting at the dimly lit booth with her, trying to learn how to use chopsticks for the hundredth time. Neela would patiently show him how to hold them and squeeze them together and then she would laugh when he dropped his chicken on his lap. Then she would show him up by eating her sweet and sour soup with the chopsticks and not spilling a drop. He could hear her laugh and he smiled. Even her smallest laugh could make his bad day turn good again.

Ray whirled around at the sound of the door handle being turned. It was amazing how an ordinary sound suddenly registered so loudly to him. He wasn't sure if he would ever be able to just open a door again and not hear the clicking of the metal rubbing together. That sound would forever instill fear in him.

"You scared me," Ray admitted as Abby walked into the room.

"Sorry," she apologized, placing a styrofoam tray of food on the counter next to Ray. She took a water bottle out of her pocket and placed it next to the tray. "I brought you something to eat. It's from the cafeteria so it's not the best but it's better than you wasting away up here."

Ray managed a weak smile. "Thanks."

Abby pulled up another chair up beside Ray's. "How is she?"

"The same."

Abby had rushed into the hospital as soon as she had found out what had happened. She wasn't scheduled to work but she had stayed. She had already offered to sit with Neela for a while to give Ray a break but he insisted on staying. Instead, Abby helped in the ER, knowing that they were always somehow short handed.

"How are you doing?" Abby asked him.

She was the first person who had asked him that. Even though people had been popping in all day to ask how Neela was doing, no one had asked him.

Ray thought about the simple question but he realized that he didn't have an answer. How could he answer her without revealing his true feelings? How could he tell Abby that he was slowly dying inside with every minute that Neela stayed in the coma? How could he tell her that, if Neela died, he wasn't sure if he would be able to go on with life? How could he tell her that he loved Neela?

"I'm hanging in there," he finally answered. He decided to change the subject. "Has Marx woken up yet?"

Abby shook her head. "Luka just checked on him but he's still out cold. They're planning to move him out of here and back to prison as soon as possible. It seems like there are a dozen cops lurking around his room."

"What about the dead cop? Has his family been notified?"

"One of the other officers took care of everything."

"I should have stopped him," Ray murmured, placing his head in his hands.

"Who?"

"Marx. I should have stopped him," he repeated more loudly.

"There's nothing you could have done. Luka told me what happened. You couldn't have known that the officers were going to try to break into the room and that he would shoot her."

"I should never have let her tie me to that chair. I should have figured something out. I should have attacked him. He was weak! He had just come out of surgery for Christ's sake!"

"And if you had attacked him? What then? He would have shot her anyway, or you. You could both be lying down in the morgue right now for all you know."

Ray shook his head. "I still should have done something."

"All you can do now is be here for her." Abby placed her hand on his shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly. "Eat," she prompted. "You need to keep your strength up."

Abby gave Neela's hand a quick squeeze before leaving. When she was gone, Ray reached for the tray of food that Abby brought. He poked the lumpy mashed potatoes with his fork a few times before shoveling a large pile of them into his mouth. They certainly weren't the best things he'd ever tasted but they were better than nothing.

Ray shoveled the potatoes and mystery meat into his mouth like he hadn't eaten in days. He picked up the water bottle that Abby had brought him and chugged it down in one long gulp. Finally satisfied, he turned back to Neela. He checked the monitors that surrounded her, something he had been doing every five minutes for the last three hours. Nothing had changed. He stroked her hair.

"I'm sorry about what happened, Neela," he said quietly. "I'm sorry that I couldn't save you. I'm sorry that I sat back and let this happen. You have to be strong, Neela. You have to make it through this. Everyone downstairs in the ER…they're all thinking about you. This place wouldn't be the same without you," he rambled and then paused.

"I wouldn't be the same without you." Again, he paused. "I never told you this before…I guess I was just afraid. I was afraid that I'd lose us and our friendship. I've felt this way for so long and I…I can't hide my heart anymore, Neela. I'm in love with you, Neela. I love you."

A tear rolled down his cheek and it landed softly on her arm.


	5. Chapter 5

Wow, I didn't expect this chapter to be like this at all. Actually, I thought this would just be a short scene but I went with it and I'm glad that I did. I hope you enjoy!

**Chapter 5**

"Time of death…thirteen forty-two." Ray snapped off his latex gloves and angrily threw them on the floor. It was the third patient he had lost already that day and his shift had only started a few hours before.

Ray pushed through the swinging doors and strode over to the front desk. He pulled down the patient board and frantically erased the name of his patient.

"Bad day?" Morris asked.

"You have no idea." Ray pushed the board back up and grabbed a chart from the bin on the desk. He began to look it over.

"Hey, how's Neela doing?"

"Fine," Ray mumbled, silently cursing Morris for bringing Neela up at all. It had been six days since she had been shot. Six days and she was still lying in a coma. Nothing had changed. Ray knew that as the days went on, there was less of a chance that she would wake up. The doctors were no longer optimistic, but no one dared tell him that. Then again, they didn't have to – he was a doctor.

Ray had tried to keep himself busy while at work so that he wouldn't think of her, but it was impossible. He spent every minute he had off from work sitting by her bedside. Sometimes he talked to her and tried to remind her of the good times they had had together. Other times, he just sat with her silently, hoping that his presence alone would somehow will her to wake up.

"Well, we all miss her," Morris said. "I mean, who wouldn't miss her. I certainly don't mind seeing her walking down the hallway. She kind of brings that whole doctor fantasy thing to life, don't you think?"

Ray glared at him. "Don't talk about her like that."

"Hey, I was just trying to make conversation," Morris replied.

"Yeah, well she isn't a piece of meat."

"Oh come on, you can't tell me you haven't thought about…"

"Shut up, Morris." Ray took the chart he was holding and walked towards exam three. He was seething with anger, just thinking about the fact that Morris disrespected Neela in that way.

As he walked, Ray tried to ignore Morris's comments, knowing that Morris was probably the most insensitive person who worked at the ER, and that he was better off just ignoring him. Ray knocked on the door of exam three and entered.

"Mrs. Hodge," he said, looking down at the chart for the name of the patient.

"Yes, hello," the woman answered, shaking Ray's hand. She was sitting on the edge of the bed with a young boy cuddled up next to her, sucking his thumb. When Ray entered, the boy turned his face so that he was hiding behind his mother.

"I'm Dr. Barnett," Ray introduced. Ray bent down so that he was face to face with the child. "What's happening, little man?"

The boy peeked out from behind her back.

"Tell the doctor what's wrong," Mrs. Hodge prompted.

The boy pointed to his throat.

"Tommy, use your words," the woman instructed. She turned to Ray. "He's shy."

"How old is he?"

"Five. He just started the first grade," she answered.

"Well, what seems to be the trouble?"

"Last night he complained of an upset stomach and he threw up in the middle of the night. Now he's saying he has a soar throat and I checked his temperature this morning and it was 100. I don't want to be one of those mothers who overreacts over every little thing, but I had to bring him in."

"You did the right thing," Ray assured her. Ray picked up a tongue depressor and showed it to the small boy. "Can you open your mouth for me and stick out your tongue?"

Hesitantly, Tommy took his thumb out of his mouth. He opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue. Ray placed the tongue depressor on Tommy's tongue and shined a small, pocket light into the back of his throat. When he saw what he was looking for, he picked up a long, cotton swab.

"This might tickle a little," Ray told him. He quickly took a swab from the back of the boy's throat. "Well, I'm not sure what's causing the vomiting, but I can say with almost certainty that he's got a bad case of strep throat." Ray placed the cotton swab in a nearby container. "It usually goes around this time of year. I'll get this tested."

"What about his stomach?"

"Can you lay down for me, buddy?" Ray asked. The mother got off the bed and Tommy stretched out. "I'm gonna feel your tummy. I want you to tell me if it hurts, okay?"

Ray skillfully pressed on various spots on Tommy's stomach. He didn't react.

"Did that hurt, honey?" The mother questioned.

Tommy shook his head.

"I'll order an ultrasound but it's probably nothing. He probably just had an unrelated upset stomach. It could have been something he ate or maybe he just ran around too much. The ultra sound will tell us more, but I wouldn't be worried."

The woman smiled. "Thank you," she said.

"I'll be back in a little bit with the ultra sound and we'll make sure that everything's all set. If it is, you can go home and we'll contact you tomorrow with the results from the strep test. If he has it, which I suspects he does, he's just got to stay home from school for a few days and rest. I'll give you some mediation, but he should be over it in no time. You should also probably notify his class if they don't already know that it's going around so that the other parents know what to expect."

Ray began to jot down notes on the boy's chart. A sharp chirping filled the room. Ray immediately reached for his beeper, which was hooked onto his belt. He finished the notes he was taking and then looked down at the small, black device. He knew the number instantly.

"Is everything alright?" Mrs. Hodge asked, noticing Ray's demeanor change instantly.

"I have to go. There's an emergency. I'll have someone else come in and do the ultrasound," Ray explained even though his thoughts were far from Tommy and his mother.

"Thank you!" The woman called as Ray threw the door open and raced out of the room.

"Morris!" He shouted as he spotted Morris walking by. "I need you to do an ultrasound on the patient in three."

"I'm not doing you any favors," Morris replied.

"I just got a page."

"So?"

"It's from Neela's room."

"So call them and find out what they want."

"Morris!"

Morris sighed. "You owe me." Ray quickly handed him the chart and raced to the elevators. He punched the up button and impatiently stood back, tapping his foot. When the doors didn't immediately open, he bounded up the stairs.

By the time he reached the fourth floor, he was panting. He bypassed the nurse who greeted him at the desk and ran to Neela's room. He stood outside the door, his hand on the door handle. He took a breath in and held it. Thoughts of what was going on behind the closed door flooded his mind. He tried to prepare himself for the worst.

Thirty seconds later, he finally let the breath out and he pushed down on the handle.


	6. Chapter 6

Okay, another chapter done. With this chapter, I really wanted to do something with Abby and Neela's relationship because I think their friendship is very comical. I just hope I did it justice. Enjoy!

**Chapter 6**

"Ray."

Ray smiled and walked to Neela's bedside. She reached out her hand to him and he took it. He brought her hand to his mouth and lightly kissed her knuckles. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks.

"You're awake," he said quietly.

"I came in to do rounds and she was lying here with her eyes open," a nurse explained. Ray hadn't even noticed the nurse when he walked in the room. He was too busy concentrating on Neela and her beautiful, open eyes. As he looked around, he realized that there was both a nurse and a doctor in the room.

"Well, everything seems to be in order," the doctor stated. "We'll come back in a little while. Just rest now."

Both the nurse and the doctor excused themselves and left the room. Ray sat down next to Neela's bed.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Tired," she admitted. The sound of her voice, although not as strong as usual, made Ray's head spin. "How are you doing?"

He smiled. "I'm doing much better now"

He kept her hand in his.

"What happened, Ray?"

"You don't remember?"

"I remember tying you up and...I remember sewing up his wound, but I don't remember anything after that."

Ray paused, trying to remember everything that happened. He had told the story what seemed like a dozen times, but he knew that she was the most important person he'd ever tell it to.

"You were sewing him up and then someone tried to open the door. There were two police officers who were trying to get in. Marx must have heard them and…and he shot you."

"But he didn't shoot you?"

"You gave him Haldol. You must have grabbed a needle when you were looking for the needle and thread to sew him up and you gave him some right before he shot you."

"What happened to him?"

"He was unconscious for a few hours because of the Haldol, but he was fine. He went back to prison yesterday. He's going to be charged with murder, kidnapping, and attempted murder."

"And you weren't hurt?"

Ray shook his head. "No." He paused and a tear rolled down his cheek.

"Ray," Neela prompted, obviously wanting him to continue.

"I couldn't help you, Neela. He shot you and you fell and I couldn't help you."

"You were tied to a chair."

"But all I could do is sit there and watch you bleed to death."

Neela brought her hand to his cheek. "I don't blame you, Ray. You did everything you could have done. We both did everything we could have. He could have killed both of us, but he didn't. We're both going to be fine."

"I thought you were gone, Neela. Even after you pulled through surgery…and these past few days. Everyone was thinking the worst, but no one would say it. And when my beeper went off…I…I stood outside your door and I didn't want to come in because I didn't…I thought you were gone. I thought I'd lost you."

"You'll never lose me."

Ray bent over and kissed her on the forehead. She closed her eyes.

"I'll let you sleep," he said quietly. "But I promise I'll be back."

He squeezed her hand gently. By the time he made it to the door, she was asleep.

Hours later, Neela was sitting up in bed, reviewing her own chart. She flipped the page and looked over all of the medicines she had been given. It was frustrating to her not remembering the last six days. She was trying to use the chart to jog her memory, but it was just full of medical diagnoses and lists of tests she was given. Even Ray's story hadn't helped her remember anything. Everything was still foggy to her.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in," Neela beckoned.

The door opened and Abby walked in.

"Hey," Abby said.

"Hi."

Abby sat. "I got you some cake from the bakery down the street." She placed a white box on the counter beside Neela's bed. "I figured you'd be sick of hospital food real soon."

"Thanks."

"How are you doing?"

"Good. They're just waiting for some tests to come back, but they say I'm doing well."

"And you obviously have made sure of that," Abby joked, pointing to the chart in Neela's hand. Neela put the chart down on her bed.

"The nurses keep trying to take it away from me. They say that they have everything under control and that I don't need to worry myself with my medical treatment."

"Doctors always have made the worst patients."

"Well, they think that I'll be able to go home in a few days as long as I take it slow. They don't want me back in work for another week or two."

"Something tells me that you're not too happy about that."

"I feel fine. I don't see what keeping me out of work will do."

"Just take it slow, Neela. We don't need you out of commission any longer than necessary." Abby paused. "I'm sorry that I wasn't able to get up here sooner. The ER's been crazy all morning."

"I understand," Neela replied. "Dr. Kovac poked his head in earlier. He said that I better get well soon or he'd have to start thinking about replacing me."

Abby laughed, knowing that Luka was just kidding. "Everyone's been asking about you, wanting to know how you are. Ray's kept everyone pretty well informed. He was up here a lot, you know."

"That's what Dr. Kovac said."

"He stayed with you for more than twenty-four hours when you got out of surgery. He wouldn't leave your side, but Luka finally convinced him to go home and sleep. Not to mention shower." They both laughed. "He came up here on his breaks and he was here when he had time off."

"He was just being a good friend," Neela stated.

"Neela, don't take this the wrong way, but a good friend checks on you once or twice a day and brings you cake. I would say he was being more than a good friend."

"We're friends, Abby. That's all we…"

"Friends don't want to sleep with their friends."

"Abby!"

"Just look at the way he looks at you, Neela."

"Nothing is going on between us."

"Maybe that's the problem."

"Abby…"

"Look, I can't tell you what to do or how to feel. But I can tell you to think about it. He has feelings for you, Neela. And, from the looks of things…you have feelings for him, too."

Neela didn't no how to respond.

"And with that," Abby said, "I have to get back to the ER." She stood. "Just think about it, Neela." She made her way to the door. "And don't forget about that cake." Abby winked at her and left.

Neela sighed and picked up her chart once more. She began to read it over again, but found herself unable to concentrate. She put it back down on the bed and she thought about what Abby had said.

"He did say it," she said aloud to herself. "He told me he loved me."

Although she didn't remember anything after she had been shot, she remembered hearing Ray's voice. She had thought that it was just a dream, but she suddenly realized that it wasn't. He had been with her all that time. He had talked to her. And he had told her that he loved her.

The question was, did she love him back?

And if she did, would she ever be able to tell him?


	7. Chapter 7

This chapter is the longest one so far, but it has definitely been my favorite chapter to write. I hope you like reading it as much as I liked writing it. Also, I take no credit for the lyrics I used in this chapter. The lyrics are from the song "I Can't Hide My Heart" by Alabama. I've actually never heard the song, but the lyrics seemed fitting. It's also where I borrowed my title from. As always, leave me comments!

**Chapter 7**

"It was good having you back, Neela," Haleh said as she approached the desk.

"Thank you, Halet, it was good to be back," Neela replied.

Neela erased her last patient from the drop down patient board. She put the eraser back and pushed the board back up.

"Hold it," Ray said, coming up from behind her. He picked up the eraser with his right hand and pulled down the board with his left, trapping Neela between his arms. He erased a patient's name.

"That was my last patient," he announced.

He put the eraser back, but then took his time to lift the board back, wanting to keep Neela close to him as long as possible. She closed her eyes and smelled the faint scent of his cologne. It made her want to smile

Finally, he let her go.

"I thought your shift was over two hours ago," Neela stated, her cheeks red. Feeling the warmth of his body against her own when he had captured her between his arms made her blush. The fact that she didn't want him to let her go made her blush even more.

Ray noticed her red cheeks and he couldn't help but smile. It seemed as if they had been physically bumping into each other for the past two weeks around the apartment. It seemed as though they would both reach for something at the same time and brush hands or they would both be trying to get through a doorway going opposite directions and they'd run into each other. Not that Ray minded.

After getting out of the hospital, two weeks earlier, Neela had been instructed to stay home and get plenty of rest. Instead, she had taken to cleaning anything and everything. Every day that Ray got home from work, something else had been scrubbed or polished. The apartment was cleaner than when he even first moved in.

But, despite all their time together, they hadn't talked about what had happened. The police had taken Neela's statement when she was well enough, but she still didn't remember anything. At least that's what Ray thought. Neela kept it to herself that she remembered Ray saying the three words that she had so desperately wanted to hear from him. She just kept telling herself that he was distraught over her being injured and that he didn't really know what he was saying when he told her that he loved her. She couldn't help but feel that he was content with things just staying the way that they were.

Ray, on the other hand, was anything but content. He thought over and over again about what he had said to her and he wished that he could tell her when she was conscious. Something had stopped him, but he didn't know what that something was. He knew, though, that he couldn't wait any longer. Not telling her was killing him. He knew that he finally had to do what his heart told him he must do.

"It was, but I got stuck with an old woman who refused to see anyone else. But, she has successfully been diagnosed and sent home," Ray answered. "And now I get to go home."

"Well, I guess we can head home together, then," Neela suggested.

Ray nodded. "Looks that way."

They both headed to the lounge and got their things. On their way out, a few more people told Neela how happy they were that she was back. She thanked them politely and walked out with Ray.

"So, how was your first day?" He asked as they began their short trek to the train station.

"It was good," Neela answered. "I had almost forgotten how chaotic it could be. I didn't see you around much."

"I was busy with patients. It seemed like every time I turned around, someone else was bleeding or throwing up."

They climbed the stairs to the top of the train platform.

"Well, I'm just glad to be back at work at all. If I scrubbed the stove one more time, I was going to go crazy."

"If you scrubbed the stove one more time, you would have scrubbed off the lettering," Ray joked.

"Well, at least it's clean."

"You can say that again."

The train pulled up and they both stepped inside. Because it was six o'clock, prime rush hour, all of the seats were taken. They both stood, holding onto the railings that ran above their heads.

"Did you want to grab a bite to eat before we get home?" Neela questioned.

"I'll whip us up something when we get back to the apartment," Ray replied.

"But there's no food in the house."

"I bought some."

"When did you go food shopping?"

"Before," he answered.

The train lurched to a stop and Neela fell forward against Ray. He instinctively grabbed her arm so that she wouldn't fall. She pressed her hands against his chest and he placed his other arm protectively around her back.

"Thanks," she said sheepishly, taking her hands off of him.

"You're welcome," he responded as he helped to steady her. She stood straight and grabbed the railing more tightly. They rode the rest of the way in a comfortable silence.

"You never did tell me when you had the chance to go shopping," Neela reminded him as they stepped off the train.

"I did it earlier," Ray replied as they entered their apartment building.

"Earlier when?"

They reached the door and Ray took out his keys.

"It's not important."

Ray put his key in the hole and turned the knob.

"But, I just…" she stopped talking as she stepped inside the room gasped. "Ray, what's going on?"

The apartment was dimly lit with candles placed all around. Soft music added to the ambiance and the apartment smelled as if someone had been cooking all day.

The couch had been moved so that the dining room table, with two chairs at either end, was the only thing in the center of the room. The table had been set for two, with expensive china that Neela had never seen before. There were two tall, lit candles surrounding a vase of red roses in the center. Two glasses of wine were already poured, one at each place.

"I wanted to celebrate your first day back."

"You went through all of this trouble for me?"

Ray took her bag from her shoulder and then helped her out of her coat.

"Well, one of the guys helped light all the candles," he admitted. He hung her coat on their coat rack and then took off his own. "But I did everything else."

"That's why I didn't see you all day. That's why you worked past your shift," Neela figured out. "Because you were here, during the day, setting this all up."

Ray shrugged. "I plead the fifth."

Ray took her by the hand and led her to the table. He pulled out her chair and she sat.

"You didn't have to do this," she said as he pushed her chair under the table.

"I wanted to," he replied. "Dinner will be ready in just a minute."

He disappeared into the kitchen. Neela looked around, amazed at how perfect everything was. No one had ever gone through so much trouble for her and she had never felt so flattered in her entire life.

Ray came back out of the kitchen and placed a large platter at the middle of the table.

Neela smiled. "My favorite. How did you know?"

"Chicken cordon bleu," Ray said. "It's the one recipe you've ever bothered to copy down from that cooking show you love so much. And, since you haven't gotten the chance to make it, I figured I'd do the honors."

He went back into the kitchen three more times and brought out three more dishes on china that matched the plates.

"No one's ever done this for me before," Neela admitted. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Ray picked up his wine glass. "To you on your first day back." Neela raised her own glass and they tapped their glasses together. They each both took a sip. "Well, dig in."

They ate slowly and chatted about their work, the meal, the city, and everything else that managed to make its way into their conversation.

When they had finished eating, almost two hours later, Ray cleared the dishes and piled them into the sink. Neela insisted on helping him wash them, but he wouldn't let her lift a finger.

"You want dessert now or later?" He asked, poking his head out of the kitchen.

"There's dessert?"

"A dinner isn't complete without dessert."

Neela smiled. "You thought of everything."

"I tried. So, how about it?"

"Maybe later," she replied. "I'm too stuffed."

"Then how about a dance?" Ray walked over to the stereo system and turned up the song that was playing.

"A dance? You never seemed like the dancing kind to me."

"Well, let's put it this way, I promise not to step on your feet."

She chuckled. Ray walked over to her and gave her his hand. Hesitantly, she put her hand in his and he pulled her to her feet. She walked with him to the center of the room and he put his hand on her waist. She wrapped her arm around his back and they began to move to the music.

I can't hide my heart

It's been that way right from the start

These feelings I know

Can't help but show

And I can't hide my heart

The lyrics played through both of their heads and Ray pulled her closer. He wrapped both his arms around her waist and she pressed her cheek against his chest. Being wrapped in his arms felt so right and she never wanted to let go.

Baby you never will be lonely, as long as I'm alive

You'll always be my one and only, for the rest of my life

"Neela," Ray whispered. "I…"

"I know," she said. She pulled away from him, but he kept his arms around her waist.

"You know what?"

"I…I heard you. I heard you when I was unconscious in that hospital room. I heard you, but I was afraid to tell you," she rambled. She knew that she wanted to say those three words to him, but she couldn't seem to get them out. "And I know that I should have told you. I should have told you right away, but I was afraid. I was afraid to admit it and I was afraid to say it back. I'm not afraid anymore, Ray. I…I…"

Both of their beepers began to ring simultaneously. Neela jumped, scared by the noise. Ray rolled his eyes.

"Don't," Ray pleaded as Neela tried to unlock his grasp to get to her beeper. Like a good doctor, it was impossible for her to ignore it.

"It's probably the hospital," Neela replied. He still didn't let her go. He wanted her to finish her sentence. He needed to hear it. "Ray, it's probably an emergency."

Finally, he let her go and they raced over to the coat stand. They both reached for their beepers in their jacket pockets. Ray immediately took out his cell phone and called the number back.

"Yeah, it's Ray," he said. He held his phone with his right hand, but kept Neela's hand secure in his left. "I'm with Neela." There was a pause. "We're on our way."

"What is it?" Neela asked.

"There was a bad accident on the highway. Twenty or so cars and a big oil tanker that flipped over and exploded. They need some doctors on the scene. Pratt's going to meet us there."

"Let's go," Neela said, letting go of Ray's hand. She grabbed her coat.

Ray ran around the apartment and blew out the candles.

"Neela," Ray said as she opened the door. She turned and looked at him. He wanted to tell her that he loved her. He wanted to shout it to the heavens, but he couldn't form the words. "Never mind." She stepped into the hallway and Ray followed her.


	8. Chapter 8

I was pretty unsure of this chapter, especially since originally I had planned something totally different, but I think it came out fairly well. Only one more chapter to go!

**Chapter 8**

"I need a neck brace!" Ray shouted.

The scene was complete chaos. The entire right side of the highway had been shut down, which caused traffic to back up in the other directions. The oil truck was lying on its side, leaking oil all over the road. There were sirens, horns, and car alarms going off in every direction. Dozens of firefighters pointed hoses at the flames that were spreading by the second. Ambulances were driving in and out of the scene, taking as many patients as possible to the nearest hospitals. Doctors, paramedics, and nurses were running around, trying to assess and treat the injured.

Ray had already pronounced two people dead and knew that, if the patient he was working on didn't get to the hospital soon, she would make number three. A young paramedic handed Ray the neck brace. Ray carefully put it around the neck of his patient.

"We lift on three!" Ray yelled to the paramedic.

Ray counted to three and he and the paramedic lifted the woman and slid her into the back of the ambulance.

"Take her!" Ray commanded. The paramedic immediately hopped in the driver's side and another paramedic jumped into the back to monitor the woman. Slowly, they maneuvered their way out of the chaos.

When he saw that the ambulance had safely made its way out, Ray looked around the scene. He spotted Neela standing next to a flipped over car nearby. He raced over to her. Her face was smudged with soot and her clothes were blackened.

"Just stay with me!" Neela yelled over all of the sounds that drowned her out.

"What's going on?" Ray asked.

"There's a young girl trapped in the car," Neela replied, trying not to speak too loudly. She didn't want the girl to overhear, but it was difficult communicating with the deafening sounds around them. "It looks like she's okay, but we can't get her seatbelt off. Her mother's already dead in the front seat. The firefighters have gone off to find something to cut her belt off."

Ray looked over at the oil that was spreading towards the car.

"If they don't get here soon, it'll be too late," he stated, pointing to the fire that was steadily progressing towards them.

"I'm going to try to squeeze myself through the window to get her out," Neela stated.

"No!" Ray protested. "I'll go!"

"You won't fit through the window! Ray, I've got to do this!"

He looked at the young girl in the car. She was crying. He turned back to Neela. "Be careful, Neela."

Neela got down on her hands and knees and punched in what was left of the window with her foot. She turned and tried to pull herself through with her arms.

"Get me a scalpel!" Neela demanded.

"You can't do a procedure in a flipped over car, Neela."

"I'm going to use it to cut her seatbelt off."

Ray raced over to one of the ambulances and searched around until he found a scalpel. He ran back over to the car and handed it to Neela.

"Hurry up, Neela," he pleaded, noticing the flames growing closer and closer.

"We need a doctor!" Someone shouted. Ray looked over and noticed two firefighters pulling a man out of his car.

"I got this! Go!" Neela yelled.

Ray ran over to the man, but couldn't help but look back at Neela. He hated leaving her alone. Ray looked over the man.

"Looks like you're leg's cut up pretty bad," Ray explained to the man who was one of the few conscious patients. "And you've probably got a concussion."

"Am I going to die?" The man asked.

"You're going to be fine," Ray insisted. "Let me just get you on a board and we'll load you right up in an ambulance."

"What about the people in the other cars? Are they all alright?" The man wondered.

"We're working on it."

Ray stood to find an available ambulance.

"I didn't even have time to react," the man rambled. "Everyone just slammed on their breaks and…"

A deafening boom filled the air. In an instance, there was a huge, fiery explosion just beside them. Ray fell to the ground, pushed by the force that the blast created.

"Neela!" He wailed as he watched the car she was in become engulfed in the flames.

Ray got to his feet and began running towards the car. As he got closer, the smoke filled his lungs and he could feel the heat on his skin. He began to stagger as a firefighter pulled him backwards. Ray struggled against the man, but he couldn't break free.

The firefighter leaned Ray against the barriers that divided the two sides of the highway and then left him. Ray began to cough and he tried to get up, but his legs wouldn't support him. He began to crawl on his hands and knees towards the car when he saw her. He could only see her outline, but it was her. Neela was walking towards him with the girl in her arms. Ray stood and he stumbled towards her. Neela gently placed the girl on the ground in front of him and then collapsed.

"Neela!" Ray shouted, kneeling beside her. She began to cough so violently that her body was shaking.

"I'm fine," she stuttered between coughs. "Help her."

Ray began to look over the little girl. He lifted her eye lids and then placed his head against her chest. Somewhere in the midst of everything, he had lost his stethoscope. Neela took hers from around her neck and handed it to him. He placed it in his ears and listened to the girl's chest.

"Sounds good," he informed her.

"She got hit on the head with something as I pulled her out," Neela explained, still coughing.

"She probably has a concussion, but I'd say otherwise she's pretty lucky. Let's get her to the hospital. And that's where you should go, too."

"No, go, I just need to catch my breath," Neela insisted.

Ray picked up the girl and brought her over to one of the ambulances. He noticed the man he was working on earlier at the same ambulance.

"Take them both to County," Ray instructed.

The ambulance driver nodded and headed off. Ray immediately went back to Neela. He placed his hand on her shoulder.

"I'm fine," she stated. Her coughing had subsided some although she still did cough between words.

"What happened?" Ray questioned.

"I was able to cut her loose and I pulled her out right when the car exploded. I don't know how we both got out of there."

"The important thing is that you did."

"There are still more patients to see."

"Are you up for that?"

She nodded and Ray helped her to her feet. Although she could still feel the burn of the smoke in her lungs, she began walking forward, in search of someone to help.


	9. Chapter 9

This is the last chapter and I really hope it doesn't disappoint. The ending of this one took an incredibly long time because I wasn't sure exactly how I wanted it to end, but I'm finally satisfied with it, and I hope you are, too. Thank you to everyone who faithfully followed this story. I've really appreciated all of your feedback and comments. Hopefully I'll be able to start working on some more stories soon. Thanks again!

**Chapter 9**

"I think I'll go take a shower," Neela said quietly as she entered the apartment building and turned on the lights. She dropped her soot covered coat on the ground, not caring what happened to it. She tiredly trudged through the apartment, her shoes leaving black footprints on the carpet as she walked. As Ray closed the door behind him, he heard her stifling a cough.

"You sure you feel okay?"

"I'm just tired," she replied. "Do you want me to help you clean up?"

Ray looked around. The remnants of their romantic evening still remained.

"I got it."

Neela nodded and headed off to the bathroom. Ray listened as she closed the door and turned the water on. He shook his head, trying to get the thought of her in the shower out of his mind. Instead, he headed to the kitchen to begin doing the dishes.

When Ray stepped out of the shower forty minutes later, he quickly dried himself off and threw on a T-shirt and sweat pants. He picked up both his and Neela's dirty clothes off the bathroom floor and threw them into a nearby laundry basket, reminding himself that he had to do laundry soon or he would run out of clothes.

Ray opened the bathroom door and walked into the living room. He looked at the clock on the wall. It was just past three.

"Neela," he began, wanting to finish the conversation that they had started earlier. He was determined to get the words out.

Ray made his way to the couch, and was about to say her name again, but then he stopped. He couldn't help but smile. Neela was lying on the couch, curled up in a tight ball, wearing his sweatshirt. She had fallen asleep. He wanted to wake her but he couldn't. She looked too peaceful and amazingly beautiful. Instead, Ray took the blanket off the back of the couch and draped it over her. He leaned over and kissed her gently on the cheek. He flicked the lights off and then turned to head towards his bedroom.

"We never finished our dance," Neela whispered.

Again, Ray smiled and he turned back towards the couch. She sat up, the sweatshirt draping over her small frame. She looked tired but her eyes still sparkled. He held out his hand to her.

"May I have this dance?" He asked.

"There's no music."

"We don't need it."

She took his hand and he helped her to her feet. He led her to the middle of the room and pulled her close to him. They wrapped their arms around each other and began to sway to the rhythm of their hearts beating.

"Neela,"

"Ray," she said at the same time.

They both laughed and looked deep into each other's eyes. Neither of them said anything, for fear of interrupting each other. Finally, Ray couldn't take it anymore.

"I love you," he said.

Tears sprang to her eyes. "I love you, too."

He bent his head down towards hers and their lips connected. The kiss was soft at first but, as the seconds passed, it grew in intensity. Neela felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her. Her legs gave way to the pleasure of the kiss and she fully leaned on Ray to keep from falling down. Ray held her tightly, never wanting to let her go. He suddenly knew that he would never have the same feelings for anyone again the way he felt about Neela during that first kiss.

Eventually, their kiss broke off. They stood together, their foreheads pressed against each other and their eyes closed.

"We should get some sleep," Ray suggested.

Neela smiled, her eyes sparkling. "I had something else in mind."

Their lips met again, this time with more passion and fervor. Ray scooped her up in his arms, never breaking their kiss. He carried her to his bedroom and laid her gently on his bed.

As the sun made its first appearance over the buildings that surrounded them, neither Neela nor Ray noticed. They were both staring into each other's eyes, oblivious as to what was going on around them. Ray stroked her hair and pulled her closer.

They were both tangled in the sheet and tangled in each other. Rays arms were wrapped around her small body, and she was curled up against his body with both her hands against his chest. Neela shivered slightly, and Ray pulled the blanket that had been kicked to the end of the bed over them both. Neither of them had slept and, although they were tired, neither of them had felt more awake before.

"This feels so right," she whispered, placing her head on his chest.

He kissed the top of her head. "I love you," he said against her hair.

She smiled, knowing that she would never be tired of hearing those three words from him.

"How did it take us so long to get here?"

"All that matters is that we got here," he replied.

"I should have told you," she began. "I should have told you that I heard you say you loved me when I was unconscious. I should have told you then that I loved you, too."

"And I should have told you I loved you from the minute I met you."

"Everyone else could see it but us. Abby, Kovac…even Marx." Neela sat up slightly, resting on her elbows. "Would this have even happened if it wasn't for Marx? Would we be here now? Would we even be considering this?"

Ray rubbed her cheek with his hand and smiled. Neela could always overanalyze any situation and yet, that was one of the many reasons he loved her.

"You're so beautiful."

She smiled and rested her head against his chest once more.

"You can't just sweet talk me any time you want to change the conversation," she said jokingly.

"Oh, and why's that?"

"Because eventually it won't work."

"But it's working now," he said, placing small kisses up and down her arm.

She let him seduce her. His touch electrified her. His smell made her dizzy. And his lips against her own was the most amazing feeling she'd ever known.

"We do have to get up eventually, you know," she informed him.

"Why?" He moaned, beginning to kiss her other arm.

"Because my shift starts in less than two hours," she answered, laughing as his beard tickled her.

"We still have two hours," he pointed out, kissing up her shoulder and neck.

"Less than two hours," she corrected.

"I think we can be a little late today, don't you?"

"You're a bad influence."

He found her mouth and kissed her deeply.

"But I'm your bad influence," he said, throwing the blanket over both of their heads.

Just short of two hours later, the train doors opened and Neela and Ray stepped outside. They walked down the stairs and down the street towards the hospital. They walked through the ambulance bay and through the automatic doors.

"We've got a trauma ten minutes out," Pratt yelled, briskly walking by them.

Abby looked up at them from behind the desk.

"Well, I'd say you two had a good night after that accident," she said, smiling.

Neela nodded. "It was a very good night," she commented.

"Very good," Ray repeated, smirking.

Neela playfully hit him on the arm and they walked together towards the lounge, holding hands. Abby leaned against the counter, folded her arms, and smiled. She watched as they disappeared into the lounge.

"Why are you smiling?" Kovac asked as he walked up behind her.

"Our two resident love birds finally fell in love," Abby replied.

"Ray and Neela? Finally?"

"Finally."

"Well, it was about time," Kova stated.

"It certainly was," Abby agreed, smiling.

Inside the lounge, Neela took off the sweatshirt that she had stolen from Ray the night before. She brought it to her nose and sniffed it. His smell still lingered, reminding her of the incredible night they had spent together and the nights that were yet to come.

She put the sweatshirt in her locker.

"I'm going to want that back," he commented, staring at her with admiration.

"Well, that's too bad," Neela replied, grinning.

She closed her locker and leaned her back against it. Ray approached her and placed his arms against the locker on both sides of her, trapping her. He leaned in and began kissing her neck.

"I told you, you can't seduce me whenever you want something," she stated as her knees became weak from his touch.

"And yet, it's working again," he replied between kisses.

"You're still not getting it back," she whispered.

"Tell you what…" He stopped kissing her. "I'll let you keep it if you promise to be mine forever."

"A sweatshirt isn't much of a prize if I have to be yours forever."

"Then how about this?"

He brought his lips to hers and kissed her more deeply than he had ever kissed anyone before. They both felt the electricity that flowed between them.

"I guess that'll have to do," she said softly, with eyes still closed, when their kiss ended.

"I love you," he said. He kissed her again, but this time more softly.

"I love you, too," she replied quietly. "But we should probably get to work."

Ray nodded and took a step backward. She opened her locker once more and took out her lab coat. He helped her into it and they walked out together, smiling.


End file.
